No F#@$ing Way!!!!

So my oldest daughter sent me this article recently which claims that those who have a tendency to use salty language were also the most honest people. My guess is she sent this because it was, a) interesting and, b) she is searching for redemption.

Now I don’t throw around that particularly distasteful four letter word loosely, though it has slipped out under my breath when I slammed a hammer down on my finger while poorly attempting some household project I should have left to professionals. Quite honestly, I don’t like the word and think it’s used gratuitously in too many areas of life. Its a word that usually makes me cringe.
That being said, I do curse on occasion. I think most people do. Not F-bomb cursing, of course, but the usual stuff that generates emotion or gets your point across.

This study, done by scientists at the University of Cambridge surveyed 276 people about their most commonly used swear words and how often the say or write them. Then they measured the participants honesty Β with questions about blaming others, cheating at games and taking advantage of people.
The study claims that while some may view swearing/cursing as negative social behavior, those same people are not filtering their language, so they are probably not fabricating stories which may result in untruths.
Essentially, if you’re willing to drop a few F-bombs, you’re probably not worried about making yourself look good in front of others.

A larger study of 74, 000 people on Facebook came up with the same results. Researchers found that people who try to keep it clean also try to look cooler online, which involved fudging the truth. That same practice of dishonesty would eventually carry over to their personal/professional lives.

While I initially dismissed my daughter’s attempt at halo polishing, the more I thought about this, the more validity it had for me. I initially told her that a person can be honest and still not curse. Then I started thinking about the people I knew, both past and present, and began compartmentalizing them. Friends, business associates, family, clergy, etc.
I even remembered a saintly aunt I had growing up, and I know she cursed, even if it was in Italian.

I began to realize, as I went through my list, that I don’t really trust the people I never heard curse. Now I understand why. If this study is correct and those who don’t curse are not honest, it stands to reason that I wouldn’t trust, or even like, them.

So there you have it. If you ever want to be taken seriously by people or have them take you into their confidence, you’d better sprinkle a little salt on your vocab. If not, you’ll find your friends becoming fewer, your professional life becoming stagnant and your family largely choosing to ignore you. Because the truth is, people who throw in a few little colorful words now and then are more fun, tell interesting stories, are better children to their parents and better parents to their children. Hell, I exchanged off-color jokes with my parents from the time I was a kid. I can still see my mother laughing as I told her another one.

Of course the seriously rigid, can always hang out with other tight ass non-cursers.

Imagine how much f@#%&ing fun that dysfunctional group will that be?

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91 thoughts on “No F#@$ing Way!!!!

  1. quiall

    My mother never swore in public and she was the most honest person I knew. Sometimes brutally so. Out of 7 billion people 70,000 think we should swear more. I respectfully disagree.

    Liked by 2 people

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  2. Andrew Reynolds

    My only compliant about swearing is that there is more to swearing than, “F-this.” Come on people, if you’re going to swear, make sure that you don’t use fck every other word and leave out some of the better ones. Variety is the spice of cursing.

    oh, I generally only swear in person where I know there are no recording devices. Wonder what that says about me…

    Liked by 1 person

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  3. Ilona Elliott

    If this is true I must be a freaking saint. But it’s true, I do strive to be a genuine person, after years of trying to be what others thought I should be. However, I know enough not to drop F-Bombs all over the place if the person I’m with is obviously offended, out of courtesy to them. There are definitely people who are explicitly genuine and don’t swear at all, and wouldn’t if they were in a bar with a couple dozen drunk sailors, which is impressive too. They don’t feel the need to fit in, they are just themselves. My mother was like that. That’s how she put up with the rest of us.

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  4. Dr. George Gallant

    Individuals that have to use the β€œF” word, to me have a minuscule vocabulary. They also lack respect for their family, friends, colleagues and that is where you fit the bill.

    If you were honest, you would be able to express yourself in a way that would offend no one.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. George Post author

      I’m not a fan of the F word, as I mentioned. I also think there’s a time and place where salty language is ok. Obviously, certain settings are off limits but I don’t know if I totally agree with your last line but since this was all in fun……

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      1. Dr. George Gallant

        Let me ask you this, why do you want to hurt another person? Kindness is the better part of valor. If you hurt others, you only end up hurting yourself in the end because you end up living with what you have done.
        Matthew 5:39 (NASB)
        39 “But I say to you, do not resist an evil person; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.

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      2. Edmark M. Law

        I am not saying that we should go out and hurt people. I am just saying that what if you want to offend someone (the reason may be petty in the grand scheme of things but that’s irrelevant) but you didn’t, would you be honest to yourself and to that person?

        For example, someone said bad things to you, and you really want to reply in kind, but you didn’t. You may have done the right thing, but you are not being honest to yourself. Note that I was just commenting on your last sentence:

        “If you are honest, you would be able to express yourself in a way that would offend no one.”

        And let’s be honest here, you should know that in reality, some people would be offended no matter what you say. You may think that what you said is good, others may perceive it differently. You can’t please everybody after all.

        Personally, I wouldn’t trust people who are angry at me inside (even for a moment) but keep smiling on the outside and saying that everything is all right and forgiven. I would prefer a straightforward person any day.

        I’d also like to point out that you are overgeneralizing over this. Saying that all the people who used the F word, even those who rarely use it do not respect their family and friends is farcical. I know people who swear but they are good people unless they are all really just bad people and pretending to respect me and their friends and family.

        There is no doubt that this is applicable to some people. But all of them? I don’t think so. You haven’t met all these people yet so you don’t have the right to judge them all. So, I think that part of your comment is quite offensive to some people. I know that it’s not your intention though.

        Also, please spare me of your religious lecture. Onward…

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      3. Edmark M. Law

        I chose not to reply to your comment a few days ago and moved on. You stated that “we can’t talk” and yet, it seems that you still have so much to say. How typical. Now, I won’t reply to your next load of wit because this conversation is just turning into a waste of time and energy. So, you may now have your “Last word, Johnny” commemt.

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  5. Kim Gorman

    Very interesting findings, George. I admit that I use the F word, but not at work, in front of my children, people I don’t know well, etc. I save it for occasions with very, very close friends who use it too that I’m in private conversation with and a couple very close family members (who aren’t my children). However, I do think that in most contexts it’s inappropriate and vulgar. As for honesty, I don’t make a habit of lying and I hate being lied to.

    Liked by 1 person

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  6. Book Club Mom

    Super interesting! I think these studies are probably right. Although a little filter is almost always a good idea, the more I think about it, the more I agree that people who swear are saying it like it is. BTW – nice tiny smiley face at the bottom of your blog! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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  7. reocochran

    I say “sh- – ” much more often than the “f” word, but when one uses it, having made it a rare occasion, family and friends stop to find out “what’s up with Robin/Mom/sister/co-worker?”
    My Dad was “big” into church; ironically, his swear words were usually variations on GD, JC or other blasphemous words. He never said Fck or my favorite one. Mom usually used variations of For Pete’s Sake, Criminy or For Goodness sakes! I think being a teacher she thought she ought to avoid them to keep from accidentally saying it to her high school students, George. πŸ˜€

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    1. George Post author

      Lol…good choice by your mom. If she practiced those words it might slip out at school and then there would be trouble..:)
      I’m like you. I say sh– and BS but not much else..;)

      Liked by 1 person

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      1. reocochran

        This made me smile, George! I spent a day trying to convince a toddler that I said, “shoot!” When his Mommy came to get him, he pointed at me and said the real word I had said. Instead of “Bad Santa” (movie reference) I became “Bad Nana!” πŸ˜€

        Liked by 1 person

    1. George Post author

      Of course flipping counts..:) and I agree that some people go overboard and it’s used in the wrong situations.
      A smiley face at the end of this blog post? I wonder why I can’t see it?

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  8. Osyth

    The only time I have EVER heard my mother use the F word was at me in a humdinger of an argument in our drive – she paused and then expectorated thus ‘the problem with you is you are so F’ing articulate’. At the time I was naively flattered, it was only much later that I thought perhaps the issue was misusing my ability to argue rings round people just because I could. My daughters all swear like troopers and reassure me it is purely generational … I tell them they are diluting the effect of a really good curse-word (and I personally don’t care for F and refuse to ever use C) but I will rethink this honesty thing because if I accept it then they are jolly honest souls and I have done a decent job of raising good humans!

    Liked by 2 people

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  9. Fourth Generation Farmgirl

    “Halo polishing.” I’ve never heard that expression. However, I am familiar with this study. Salty language in the right context (not gratuitous) can add humor to a story or sum up a situation perfectly. I think your daughter and I would get along well. πŸ˜‡

    Liked by 1 person

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  10. colorpencil2014

    Hmm, funny story but I have a hard time believing it. Earlier studies also showed that people who curse a lot will become more violent and abusive quicker since they already use the channeling of anger by cursing on a daily base so to speak. So I guess as usual, when it comes to scientific research there is always a test that proofs one right ;o) I love coffee and when poopoo-ed about it I will show numerous scientific research that prove it is ever so healthy. And FIY, I do curse too when hitting my thumb with a hammer..bilingual!! Cheers, Johanna

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    1. George Post author

      That hammer thing never fails..:)
      I’ve always believed you can take numbers and research and make them say whatever you want them to say. So I take everything with many grains of salt..:)

      Liked by 1 person

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  11. Lynn

    An interesting read George. I don’t have a problem with using the f-bomb, when it’s used in the context of telling a story or yes, when a hammer hits your thumb. All in moderation is my motto, & of course it goes without saying to know that there are appropriate times to curse & appropriate times not to. I guess that makes me honest????

    Liked by 1 person

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  12. In My Cluttered Attic

    George, this was a d#*!+m good post, not like some of the sh%ty ones my f!#k&*g staff puts out. As you know I’m a trust worthy s*n of a b&#@h who uses F-bombs every second, unlike some a*#h%@!s who sparingly use s*%t only every three seconds. πŸ˜€

    Liked by 3 people

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  13. Ann Coleman

    I laughed out loud at that last line! And I agree, that group would be seriously dysfunctional!
    I do think that I tend to trust people who curse more than those who don’t (although by “curse” I mean say swear words when they are angry, not those who think the F word is an adjective that needs to be inserted in every single sentence they utter). I think we all get mad and lose our temper from time to time, and in those occasions, a curse word is what naturally comes out of our mouths. People who don’t ever curse are not letting their true nature show through, and I don’t trust that.
    Plus, one of my favorite staffers at the shelter where I volunteer swears like a sailor! Her most common response to any stupid question I ask is, “Are you a F**King idiot?” Straight and to the point, that’s her! But you’ll never meet a more loyal friend….

    Liked by 1 person

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  14. sportsattitudes

    I curse like someone is going to take that ability away from me if I don’t keep up my “strength” and do it constantly. Of course that’s inside the house. Outside of the house I will also let fly but I do know my audience and pick my spots accordingly. I have found many folks who don’t have that filter either by choice or by heredity…and that can be awkward indeed in any setting. I think people who curse on occasion are more honest…no lie.

    Liked by 1 person

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  15. Miriam

    My mum very occasionally swore in Italian and I have to admit to throwing out the odd choice word in the last year or two. I used to think that people who swore were ignorant and just didn’t know any better words but sometimes there’s just no other way of expression! 😏

    Liked by 1 person

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  16. aFrankAngle

    Many chuckles and ponderings in this one. George Carlin provided the perfect ending. You reminded me of a shocking F-bomb I heard … at work … by the owner of the company … over the phone … to a company that provided software we were considering! …. I’m no prude, but I wasn’t sad when I left a month later.

    Liked by 1 person

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  17. Edmark M. Law

    We have too much curse words in Chinese (especially Cantonese) to pick one or two favorites :).

    In English, I usually use d*mn, sh~ and my favorite – BS since there are just too much BS in this world that should be pointed out.

    But there’s more to language than swearing. You can convey things in a more colorful way than just cursing if you are creative enough. Just look at Mark Twain’s words for instance. I prefer that way if I have to reprimand somebody.

    Oh, I’m Abyssbrain of (now deleted) Mathemagical Site btw. How are you George? I hope that you are doing well.

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    1. George Post author

      How are you?!! I wondered where you went. Math was never a favorite of mine but I always enjoyed your site. Seems like I always learned something, except for those things that went over my head..:)
      I will have to check out your new site. Thanks for visiting…:)

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      1. Edmark M. Law

        I’m fine. It’s unfortunate and sad that I had to shutdown my old blog. That was my first blog after all.

        I found out early last year that somebody has been stealing some of my anagrams and publishing them on a recreational Lingustics journal. I tried to directly contact the author but he didn’t even reply. The sad thing is that the chief editor of that journal is my friend so I refrained from shaming the journal.

        Besides, it’s primarily the fault of the “author” anyway. So I just told the editor about the incident and he promised that the author would face “severe reprimand and disciplinary action”. That’s good enough for my and I didn’t push the issue further. So far, I haven’t seen him write anything else and I hope that he learned a lesson from this and be a better author and person someday.

        So, I don’t think that I would publish my original anagrams and wordplays on my new blog though I would still posts some of my original math stuff.

        Finding plagiarism is a lot easier in mathematics than other subjects (at least for me).

        Like

      2. George Post author

        That’s sad and interesting about plagiarism and math. I never realized it related to math in the same way as it does the written word but then I’m not a math person. ..:)
        Glad to see you back here..:)

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Edmark M. Law

        What’s interesting about mathematics is that you can’t disguise an idea as a new idea by modifying some things and dressing it up since math is a very standardized subject. In other subjects, some people can get away with it by arguing that it’s “different enough”. In math, if you release a new research, you have to provide all your methodologies and references in great and extensive detail. The editors are smart enough to figure out whether the idea is new. If it somehow bypassed the editors (which is practically improbable unless if the editors aren’t good enough or the plagiarist is clever), it won’t survive the scruitinies of the following peer reviews…

        Anyway, anything can be plagiarized – music, art, software. If you visit some programming forums, you would see several rants about people stealing their codes and all the drama that come with them…

        Liked by 1 person

  18. Lekha murali

    I am trying to cut down on profanity, then I read this article.
    I have to disagree a little bit when it comes to the correlation between honesty and profanity, although there is some logic to the basis for the study. I have heard people who are not profane, swear under the right circumstances – pressure and time is all it takes.
    But I also know people with excellent command of language, who can express anger and frustration without breaking spontaneity or honesty.
    Still, I am going to stick to the promise I made to myself over a year ago and cut down on swearing.

    By the way, thanks for the George Carlin quote. You should post them more often. Where is a George Carlin, when we sorely need one? Talk about your brutal honesty.

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  19. Pingback: Carlin says curse – The Mexi Movie

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