I have this condition not many people know about. I touch things when I’m not supposed to. So my guess is your eyes just got wide or you started to smile while your mind began to race. Really? He’s going to go there? That’s out of the ordinary for him but okay, I’ll listen. For a moment.
Sorry to disappoint you but you need to elevate your thoughts.
My touching problem is related to times when I’ve been instructed by signs or people not to touch certain things.
As an example, if I walk into a store that’s selling expensive pieces and there’s a sign that tells me not to touch anything, it’s like an invitation for me touch everything I can put my fingers on.
If I walk into a historic home and I’m told not to touch the wallpaper or pieces of furniture, guess who needs to find a way. I’m sorry but as I mentioned earlier, it’s just a condition I was diagnosed with years ago. It’s called PWCSTFTSTNST. That’s short for, People Who Can’t Stop Themselves From Touching Stuff They’re Not Supposed To.
Apparently it’s very rare. Or maybe it’s not.
I think it’s related to some kind of defiant disorder which I don’t have but use whenever I need to explain myself to the security guards who ask me to leave these establishments.
It’s like going for a test at the doctor or dentist’s office and they tell you not to move while they’re taking an x-ray. Why is it you develop an itch that you need to scratch, just at that moment. This is sort of like that without the historical or monetary issues behind it.
I just have a need to touch history and wealth. What can I say?
Anyway, I decided to leave you with this video since I think of this song every time I see one of these signs. Admit it, you love this song. If you were around in 1990 you probably have the album. The only question is whether you bought the pants.