There’s A Place For Naked

Okay, so let me first say that it’s my belief most people, especially after a certain age, look better with their clothes on than with them off. Of course that’s a generalization but if we’re all being honest here it’s a generalization that has some merit with a ratio that is dramatically skewed one way rather than the other. I’ll let you determine which is which.

So when I read that there was a restaurant opening in London where clothing was optional, there were obvious questions that came to mind. The first relating to what kind of seats they were planning to use and what the disinfectant policy was for said seats. Because I have to believe everyone should be asking that question, don’t you think?

Unknown

Me: Hi, I’d like to make a reservation for your naked restaurant but first I’d like to know how you intend to remove the residuals left from the seat of the previous diner.

Hostess: I don’t understand the question.

Me: Okay, let me be more clear. You have someone who wipes tables down or changes table clothes when guests leave, right?

Hostess: Yes, of course.

Me: Okay, So when someone leaves and before someone else sits in the seat of the person who left, who from your staff cleans the area where the previous diner rested, sweated and shifted on his or her butt for two hours.

Hostess: Oh, I see what you mean.

Me: Great, so we’re making progress. Do you have an answer?

Hostess: Yes, we use a very strong disinfectant. No need to worry.

Me: No need to worry about catching germs or no need to worry about the strong disinfectant burning my skin after its been cleaned and me sitting on it for two hours.

Hostess: Yes

Me: Yes, what?

Hostess: Yes, no need to worry. Now if you want to make a reservation I should tell you there is a Β wait list of 15 thousand.

Me: 15 thousand what?

Hostess; 15 thousand people

Me: You’re kidding, right?

Hostess: Do you want to make a reservation, Sir?

Me: Can you give me more information on the seat cleaning process?

Hostess: Hanging up

So The Bunyadi Restaurant in London is opening this summer and it has naked and clothed sections with a naked section waiting list of fifteen thousand brave souls. Who knew there was a demographic gap in the restaurant industry we were all clueless about.

 

I don’t know about you but sometimes it’s tough watching people eat with their clothes on. I can’t imagine enjoying and attempt to digest a good meal when the views are less than appetizing. Then again, I still haven’t moved past the seating issue.

Unknown-1

So is your name on the list of fifteen thousand? If a restaurant like this opened in your hometown would you consider going?

Don’t worry, I won’t judge. But if a rash develops soon after you leave and you have difficulty sitting for several days, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

 

74 thoughts on “There’s A Place For Naked

  1. davidprosser

    If I were a naked guest there (Let me assure you it won’t happen) I should want to make sure I wasn’t sitting in a draught. Imagine Winter and someone opens the door to the outside !
    If I were a member of staff serving table, I would want hazard pay for my eyes.
    Hugs

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    1. George Post author

      lol…never thought about winter, David, or how difficult it might be for the staff. I wonder if they have to agree to be naked or if they can dress. Guess we won’t know unless someone spills the beans..:)

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  2. Ilona Elliott

    I’m not sure I get the point of eating out naked. Generally speaking, getting ready to go out to dinner usually involves dressing up just a little bit from whatever you happen to be wearing that day unless you’ve been in church (are there nudist churches?) or at a wedding or other dress up event prior to your dinner, or if you dress for work which is less and less common. Even so, a nudist should at least put on a tie for crying out loud. And are they using cloth napkins and how do they plan to clean those after they’ve been in peoples laps for a while is another important question. Oh geez George, this is one post that made me think of things I’ve never considered before. Thanks for posting. I think.

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    1. George Post author

      Lol… You bring up some of the same questions I’ve had and some I haven’t thought of yet. I know, sometimes you just don’t want to think too much about the obvious..:)

      Liked by 1 person

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  3. Miriam

    I kinda like the idea of dressing up when I go out, not dressing down. And I definitely don’t like the idea of going in my birthday suit either. I wouldn’t even go to a nudist beach, much less a nudist restaurant. Don’t think I look too bad for my age but I’ll save the exhibitionism for the bedroom thanks! The thought of eating with hundreds of other naked people does nothing for me or my appetite. A weird idea. :-/

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    1. George Post author

      I agree, Miriam. Beaches are fine but naked restaurants are a different ballgame. A strange idea but like every strange idea someone comes up with, there are thousands of curious participants…:)

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  4. Ann Coleman

    Kiddos for being brave enough to state the truth that most people look so much better with their clothes on! And even aside from the hygiene issues, I have no desire to dine out in public naked, and doubt that I would have much appetite left if I had to watch others eating naked, either. Very funny post!

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    1. George Post author

      Lol…I agree completely. But don’t you worry see about the people that choose to go, what they’re like and if you would know them and not even think they’d do something like this?..:)

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  5. Kate Crimmins

    Do they make arrangements for those “Depends” wearers who have the occasional accidents? Who in their right mind wants to sit in public naked and eat. How do you get there or do you undress after you walk in the door? Where do you pin your brooch? Or do you accessorize with a scarf (a really big one)? This is one of those things that leaves us with more questions than answers including who in their right mind (over the age of let’s say 30) would WANT to do this?

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    1. colinandray

      My imagination is running riot with this idea……….. but perhaps it is all a very successful PR exercise. It has certainly got lots of people talking! Is “Spotted Dick” still a dessert in the UK. Just asking! πŸ™‚

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      1. George Post author

        Lol…never heard of the spotted dick in the UK but if they have it anywhere it’ll be in this place. Yes, one’s imagination can take off to many places. I was trying to stay as straight as possible. No pun intended..:)

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    2. George Post author

      Oh yeah, I forgot about the brooch..lol. I believe they have changing rooms there so you don’t have to walk in naked. No mention of the Depends wearer but I’m guessing they’ve not prepared for that possibility. So many questions, so few answers..:

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  6. colinandray

    I wonder if the washrooms/toilets are specially equipped to wash….. everything? I wonder what the service staff are wearing when they serve, clean away and wipe down the tables? I wonder if you would be asked to leave if you pointed and giggled? Could you complain that the steak was fine but the waitress dropped a carrot in your lap and refused to pick it up?
    Are napkins allowed, or would they take away from the ambiance? So many questions.

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  7. Dale

    Let me touch on a subject that no one has dared to thus far… That hairy-chested man sitting there about to eat? Hairy-chest hairs… hair in your food… who does it belong to? Where did it come from? A level of ewww I could not fathom… and truly. Could they not supply fresh seat covers for each new guest? No… I cannot understand the appeal of watching some droopy-boobed patron eating her spaghetti…

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      1. Dale

        Sorry… But really, think about it… I once ordered a poutine (fries, cheese curds, gravy – heart attack stuff but oh-so-good once in a while)… Got 2/3 down and… My appetite was gone. I shall leave you to fill in the blanks…

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  8. Diana Taglianetti

    When my son, Chris, started to shower on his own, I noticed that the washcloth I provided to him was never touched, day after day. So, one day I asked him why and he said he wanted to shower like a guy, with just a bar of soap (no washcloth). So, as a mom, I asked “how do you clean your coolie?”. His response….”I swipe it like a Visa card”. So, therefore, I would never, ever eat in naked restaurant for fear that my credit card would be swiped the same way. Take care, George.

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  9. candidkay

    I was smiling from your opening onward:). Good God! If I want to sit on seats where I’m worried some form of nakedness has been, I’ll do it in my own kitchen (I have teen boys). I have a feeling that I might expire before they get through the 15,000. I’ll settle for the restaurant where you eat in the dark instead.

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  10. Nurse Kelly

    Saw this on the news! It caught the eye of my 16 year old son, who immediately said, “I’m going there!” My husband and I both looked at each other and then at him, and at the same time said, “Gross!” Then we proceeded to have the same conversation with him as you did with that hostess!
    Needless to say, no, I am not on the waiting list!

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    1. George Post author

      Lol…so that’s the demographic this place appeals to. My guess was that it was always the under 25 crowd, with some exceptions, of course. They don’t know any better and hygiene really isn’t a priority yet for most of them. It’s all about the experience..:)

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  11. aFrankAngle

    Love the post … and cheers to the comments!

    You’re question is more than understandable and deserves an acceptable answer. As for me, I don’t eat naked in my own house, so I doubt I would consider such an establishment. Besides, I’m guessing that those that I would want to see naked would be eating in the clothed section … and those that I won’t want to see naked … well …

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